Okay, so my beautiful daughter Jesse introduced me to the Deviant art site and I'm trying to fill in some bits as time permits here... bear with me. I think i'll just start things off by pasting some of my old blogs into this journal just so I have something for people to read until I get a chance to really sit and work on this a bit. Just as a side note, I was able to spend the day with my girl for the first time in about three years yesterday... I can't remember a better day in a long time. Anyway, here's my first blog about ESP. Might wanna mention- I'm a frustrated stand up comedian wannabe.

I think I have a kind of fifth sense. Yes I said fifth, not sixth, because my hearing is so bad I only consider myself as having four "natural" senses... this extra one brings me back to the normal number. I also have another (what most people would call a seventh sense, but for me is a sixth-- confused yet?) But all it does is make me aware whenever someone has cabbage in their refrigerators, and I haven't found any useful way to use that. Suffice it to say: if you have cabbage (and you know who you are) I know about it.
The fifth sense I have is this; I can tell immediately when a female will under no circumstances sleep with me. Sadly the converse is not true. That is to say I can't tell when a woman wants to sleep with me with any accuracy, just when she absolutely will not. I get a tingling sensation... a kind of buzzing like when your phone is on vibrate, when a woman who would never sleep with me gets in range. This does not mean that when I'm near a woman and I don't get "buzzed" that she's interested... she could well just be ambivalent, or gay, or retarded, who knows. I don't have to see the woman to get the buzz either. Many times I find myself reaching to answer my phone only to realize I'm not getting a call, but some woman just drove by my house who would under no circumstances sleep with me. This is fairly redundant being that I have already decided to save myself for my second marriage, but it can be depressing anyway. I don't have to be making the beast with two backs to feel good about myself, but it would be nice to know someone is interested. I saw a beautiful brunette yesterday... long legs, big blue eyes... and as the buzzing began I realized I wasn't too disappointed- she had a fridge full of cabbage. Nasty.